Rant of the week: Jon is a slacker!

I apologize for the fact that there was no rant of the week last week.

I know that no one was looking for one, but I will not offer that as an excuse.

Now, here is what Providence needs to do to advance to the TD Banknorth Garden:

Score a ****ing goal: The only thing worse than being swept by BU is being swept by BU without scoring a goal. Unbelievable. I understand that the Terriers have turned around their horrible goaltending from earlier this year, but not scoring a single goal is still unacceptable. Obviously, PC needs to score goals to win in this series.

Improve on the powerplay: This ties into the above point, but if you want to jump start your offense, you have to figure out a way to score on the power play. The play did improve in the 2-0 loss at BU, but not enough to score a goal, obviously.

Shut down Nathan Gerbe: This might be the tallest task of all (no pun intended) because Gerbe is by far the most talented player on the ice for both teams. Tyler Sims came up HUGE against Gerbe in the season series and shut him down of a few odd man rushes in the 2-2 tie at the Coffin. If they can keep this up, PC gives themselves a chance to advance.

Be Opportunistic: BC made some horrible horrible defensive and goaltending gaffs in the season series. PC needs to pounce on these.

Weather the storm: As the game goes on, BC's advantage is talent becomes more obvious. PC HAS to build up a big enough lead - or have enough in reserve- to weather these third period surges. BC's dominance in the first few years of Army's reign was due to PC running out of gas at the end of the game.

Stay out of the box: Self explanatory.

Whatever you did in the first two games at Conte, repeat: This was a good matchup for PC this year. There's no reason why that success can't be repeated. Except for the fact that God hates PC athletics and He enjoys mocking us.

Further Rants:
-The Bruins made no trades before the deadline, and the fan base has been rewarded with one of the most PATHETIC ongoing string of hockey games I've ever seen. Eight goals in eight games? Sigh.

-Kevin Walsh has as much "dirt" on the Patriots as I have on Paris Hilton. Someone smash ESPN on the head with the bowling ball and tell them to stop talking about story where the proof is "hidden". What next ESPN? A startling expose on Bigfoot?

-I can not for the life of me imagine Kevin Garnett kicking back at night and chilling out to Phil Collins. Sorry, I can't see it...

-Was that the end of Tim Welsh? Or is there something even worse on the horizon for PC's basketball team. Incidentally, if UCONN is really that good, would they have lost to the Lame Duck Friars TWICE?!?!?

-Are people really freaking out about the Red Sox struggling through spring training? Honestly?

-Bobby Knight on ESPN last night actually did a pretty good job. I'm just waiting for him to throw a chair at Digger Phelps' head.

-I've given props to the WCHA Whining Blog before and I'll do it again. I'd say we need a Hockey East version of that blog, but since UNH Fans were chosen as a "whiner of the week" that idea might be redundant. Still, I can't see the recent winner - a MSU-M player who went after one of his own fans - being beaten any time soon.

-Lock up your women and children! The Pinheads MIGHT be back!

-Now that the Hockey East regular season is at an end, I can say unequivocally that "Jack Parker is a man of many jackets" is the best Bob Norton quote of the year.

-I know nothing about Joe Bertagna's religious life, but I have to feel he's praying for UNH, BU, UVM and BC to get to the Gahden next weekend. And I'm hoping just as hard for the opposite.